Our Solitude with Him. Jesus doesn’t take us aside
and explain things to us all the time; He explains things to us as we
are able to understand them. The lives of others are examples for us,
but God requires us to examine our own souls. It is slow work— so slow
that it takes God all of time and eternity to make a man or woman
conform to His purpose. We can only be used by God after we allow Him to
show us the deep, hidden areas of our own character. It is astounding
how ignorant we are about ourselves! We don’t even recognize the envy,
laziness, or pride within us when we see it. But Jesus will reveal to us
everything we have held within ourselves before His grace began to
work. How many of us have learned to look inwardly with courage?
We have to get rid of the idea that we understand ourselves. That is
always the last bit of pride to go. The only One who understands us is
God. The greatest curse in our spiritual life is pride. If we have ever
had a glimpse of what we are like in the sight of God, we will never
say, “Oh, I’m so unworthy.” We will understand that this goes without
saying. But as long as there is any doubt that we are unworthy, God will
continue to close us in until He gets us alone. Whenever there is any
element of pride or conceit remaining, Jesus can’t teach us anything. He
will allow us to experience heartbreak or the disappointment we feel
when our intellectual pride is wounded. He will reveal numerous
misplaced affections or desires— things over which we never thought He
would have to get us alone. Many things are shown to us, often without
effect. But when God gets us alone over them, they will be clear.
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